35: Big But?

This week we’re talking about a simple change to make when you find yourself saying something with a “big but” in the middle like

“My son is smart, but he doesn’t study”

“I want to stay out of it, but she’s making a mistake.”

“I know it’s good for him, but it’s so hard to watch her struggle.”

I’ll walk you through a simple process that gives you a more clear-eyed picture of the situation, and either more peace with it or power to change it.


  • What the 2 halves of a “big but” statement mean.
  • What it means to feel your feelings and how to do it.
  • Why it’s important to feel your feelings first, before you take any action to change the situation.
  • Simple word swap that makes those statements more powerful.

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